truth

i have nvr know that someone can be tt bad... mayb bad is not the word... he is not a word can describe... i have nvr known a person can went tt deep to tell a lie.. or lies.. tt blinded mi to see the truth...

i blame myself for believing mi... i blame myself for trusting you so much.. coz i nvr know u r hu u r... u r no longer the person i love... the person i use to noe... perharps i have nvr noe u nvr understand you.. nobody did... nobody... it makes mi feel that u r a very scary person.. someone untouchable n unreachable... but i have nvr regret loving you.. coz i love the person i tot u r.. the one hu is w mi.. thou not truth thou it doesnt last long.. but i nvr regret... however i do blame myself for trusting... will i be closing myself up once again.. refusing to trust anymore.. i guess so.. i'm tired now.. really tired....

n please dun talk about love or to be loved.. u dun hav the right to love someone or to be loved by someone.. u dun deserve any.. dun wish to commit den forget abt ur tot of loving someone or giving love to someone.. coz u cant love someone.. u dunnoe wad is love... neither do u deserve any love from anybody.. nor from mi... mayb i owe u.. but i certainly paid you back.. n paid more than enuff.. which makes mi feel enuff... really enuff of u...

holding on to something tt makes mi so tired... i think i have giv all i can... yet u r out w other ger.. being kp in the dark.. tts really something tt i hav nvr tot of... but its better than too late... i see the truth now.. i will not wish u luck in ur future or w the ger... coz u will not derserve any.. u wan to play.. yah.. play all u can.. coz u will be played instead... think u shld change ur nick to 'play or to be played.. ANS: to be played'... haha nice 1... but think even if u r being played.. u oso happy.. coz u r simply er xin lahz.. omg!!...

why am i typing all these?.. make myself feel better?.... nope ba... every sentence tt i type .... my heart-ache go a inch deeper... perharps cursing u will makes mi feel better... but i still love you.. tts the ugliest truth.. which i dun understand myself.. for all tt u have done.. why am i still here... walking on a path tt leading to noway... but 1 thing for sure... i hav all my frenz walking w mi...

thanks wei... love u lots.. always there for mi... no matter wad... no matter wad i do.. right or wrong... thanks jas and jian.. to pei mi... thanks for listening to mi.. thanks for trying ur best to cheer mi up... thanks for everything.. even thou u r tired.. but u didnt say anything... thanks grevin... i have said many times le i noe.. thanks.. satiysh n peikun.. thanks... n jo.. thanks... i dunnoe wad i wanna say... just feeling great.. coz i still have my frenz w mi....

"i still cant change the habit of typing little msg here.... many noes wad it is... many noes... coz it used to be so impt to mi... used to..... but i will change it... i will be alright de... i will... "

bye~.. -=tiNg=-